Do you believe that People Ignite Greatness – first within themselves and then within others – in that order? If so, you and I hold a similar perspective.
As creator of The P.I.G. Perspective – Taking Business Relationships and Results Higher Through Deeper Connections™, I’m committed to help leaders and sales and service professionals make their best impact now! My mission is to inspire them to connect, communicate, and cultivate great relationships to support great performance. Face it– cooperative, productive, mutually rewarding relationships are good business – in fact, they are profitable business!
Unfortunately, life is not all wine and roses, and people are less than perfect. But rather than seeking to bring the best out in others in all situations, we let our noses get out of joint by, sometimes, the smallest incidences that can have a huge impact, not only on the relationship, but on our career, on our ultimate success, and on our entire life. I see this all the time, and it doesn’t need to be. People may, from time to time, offend you – either intentionally (due to an insecurity within themselves) or unintentionally. Ain’t none of us perfect. But, we do have the power to forgive.
If you are a frequent reader of this newsletter, you know that I share personal stories, but don’t be tempted to think, “Aw, she’s not talking business.” Yes, I am. When it comes to work relationships, it’s still all personal, and don’t think it’s not.
For example, it’s well known that Thomas Jefferson and John Adams, the “voice” and the “pen” respectively, of the Declaration of Independence, became fast friends as they fought for America’s freedom from British rule, but later parted company once the United States was formed and both espoused differing political points of view and the rancor began. It wasn’t until years after both had retired that Adam’s extended the “olive branch” to Jefferson who responded with joy and happy recollections of the time they both labored for the same cause. However, had it not been for Adam’s willingness to forgive Jefferson (who really had been a bit of a skunk where Adams was concerned), they might have remained separated the rest of their lives. Instead they enjoyed fourteen years of wonderful, close friendship.
Forgiveness seems difficult because it demands that we surrender our need to be right, to justify ourselves, to invalidate the other person, and to avoid accepting responsibility. But, the payoff is worth it. With forgiveness comes renewed vitality, greater happiness, and the ability to be in full expression of who and what we are intended to be–human beings who make the world a better place to live or the workplace a better place to spend eight to ten hours a day.
Spring is a time of renewal. It’s a time when we reassess our lives, our relationships, and our work. Why not let it be a time of renewal for you.
Rather than seeing others with negative intentions, why not be magnanimous and choose to see those with whom you struggle as people with positive intentions, but different from your own. Rather than seeing others as obstacles in your path, why not see them as an opportunity to learn more about yourself and grow in the process. Rather than looking at others and seeing the differences, why not look at them as people who need the same thing you need–the love and acceptance of others.
Become your own best coach, and answer the following questions:
• Is there anyone at work against whom I am holding a grudge? Have ill feelings? With whom I’m on the outs?
• What am I allowing to stand in my way of making amends?
• What is the impact of my own negative feelings toward this person(s)?
• What’s the payoff (benefits) to me of holding negative feelings? Is the payoff long term or short term?
• What’s the price I am paying for maintaining my negative feelings? Is the price I’m paying long term or short term?
• Given my responses to the questions above, it is worth it to maintain my negativity? If not, what could I do to change the current situation?